Rex – a cop’s best friend (or Inspector Rex) might not be known to everyone – it’s Austrian-German and it was a while since it was on, at least here – sometime in the late 1990’s, but for those who do know about it and haven’t checked out my fics before, you’re welcome to take a look.

… despite everything. Millennium isn’t very popular and I’m not sure where the inspiration for these fics came from, but here they are anyway. I suppose I’m nostalgic for the (relatively) good old days (read: the 1990’s) and the fin de siècle ambiance.

My life is over. No, I’m not dead or even dying, at least not any more than we, all of us, are from the time we’re born. In fact, using some definition of ‘life’ I might be around for a very long time more. Unfortunately, in my family, we tend to have very long ‘lives’.

What I mean is, any hope I ever had of deriving any pleasure from life is gone. I should have seen it sooner, really. Like the smart little frog, I should have seen where this was going and given up and drowned. The stupid frog wins, someone saves him. No one’s going to save me and frankly, I wouldn’t want anyone else to save me. If I can’t save myself, I don’t want to be saved. And I can’t. So, like I said. It’s over.

You might ask what’s changed since last night. Well, in a way, a lot of things have changed. It seems I will probably be stuck in this hell hole where I ‘live’ for – well, for as long as I ‘live’. My one chance of getting out of here just vanished. I can’t tell you exactly what happened, because it’s still too painful. I don’t even know the full circumstances yet. Chances are, I won’t want to know.

Secondly, I had some other bad news. I can’t tell you what that is either. You probably wouldn’t understand, but it was the one thing I still had left to hope for, other than getting out of here.

It’s time I face the facts. I’ll never succeed in anything I try. I should have known sooner. I’ve been failing for more years than I like to remember. The truth is, I’ve never succeeded at anything after I left school.

Time to give up. Time to stop trying. Why should I set myself up for disappointment, when it’s clear that nothing is ever going to work out? Each time I allow myself to hope, those hopes are crushed, sooner or later.

This time I should be smart and stop. Stop trying, stop hoping, stop hurting. Except that last one won’t be possible. When I look at others around me the inevitable comparisons are going to show up. Why is she such a success when I’m not?

Of course, I only have myself to blame. I was born this way. Set up for failure from the time I was born. I’ve tried as hard as I’ve been able to try. As hard as someone like me is capable of. What a cruel joke.

I read somewhere that we, humanity, Earth, the universe, might just be one big simulation, created by some beings far more powerful than we are. In that case, i can only conclude that they did it out of spite. Doesn’t everything seem like one big cruel, sadistic joke? To me it does.

So this is it. TIme to get smart. Time to finally learn from my life and take the consequences. Maybe it will hurt a little less if I stop trying.

This week I thought I’d share my Midsomer Murders fics. As usual, read the ratings and warnings.

This week I thought I’d share my Miami Vice fics. They’re based on the tv series, not the movie. You might wonder why I write fanfics based on an old tv series. The answer is DVD:s. A couple of years ago I found some cheap DVD:s at the supermarket and decided to buy four of them (at a very good price). Two of them contained a couple of episodes of Miami Vice. Right away, I was hooked. I really need to see the rest of those episodes.

I found these on You Tube and couldn’t choose between them. What a hottie he is.

Cute fan videos based on a likewise cute short film I saw a couple of years ago. These guys were pretty much beginners and despite that they did such a great job. Well done.

The weird thing is I know I’ve seen the blond guy somewhere in real life. Can’t think where it might have been, but I’m sure I recognized him as soon as I saw him in the movie. Well, I guess all mysteries can’t be solved…

Check out this fanvid. Even at his age this guy’s so – hot.

This one too, is about Boromir and Faramir.